Has the time come?

For the last few weeks, I have been debating that endless debate in my mind...Is it time for me to finally get back to work? 

There have been multiple triggers for this debate - a sudden deluge of placement consultants sending linkedin requests, part-time jobs becoming available in the standard 'corporate' space, my friends getting back to work before I have even thought about it, the desire to make money again and the fact that my kid is now in 'big' school.

There are ofcourse pros and cons of both options but that just makes it harder to decide....there are so many positives of getting back:

• more money in the household - maybe we can finally afford a house in this maximum city (see how money figures as the top reason!)
• my mind will get that intellectual stimulation it so craves presently
• probably my self-confidence will get a boost....maybe its just me but when some of my old college friends ask me, "What are you doing these days?"...I am almost afraid to admit and say I am a full time wife and mother...
• my son will probably get less clingy and weepy if I am 3 minutes late in getting to his school for the sports day

But then again it is so hard to let go of habits formed over 4 years...getting back to work will probably mean:

• my house will no longer run on the clockwork precision that it does now...
• the freedom to step out and do things I want will go - after all you cannot visit an art exhibition during office hours...
• my son might get more clingy and weepy if I am 3 minutes late in getting to his school for the sports day - its hard to let go and hand over your baby to a nanny ....she clearly is not good enough for him !!

oh decisions decisions...doubt if it will be sorted in a hurry...

Role reversal

Last night, at our writers club there was an interesting discussion on role reversal - we had to visualise and write down a situation where traditional roles were reversed - maybe if the boss asks for a raise from the subordinate, husband takes over core domestic responsibilities etc...

Interestingly the first thing that came to my mind was the role reversal with my domestic help - maybe her threats to leave had left a deeper impact than I thought they would...the situation would probably be something like this...here goes:

Today when the maid came in through the door, I forgot to say "Namaste". That was the start of an awful day because nothing I did seemed correct to her and nothing I said sounded polite enough...When I got down to cooking she really took off on me. She pointed out that I had forgotten to add salt to the daal, when I made chappatis, she said I used too much flour, when I washed up the utensils, she said I used too much soap, when I washed the bottles, she said I used too little soap!

But the worst was yet to come. When my 4 year old was back from school, she noticed that as usual, I forgot to wash his hands properly. That really set her off...I got a 20 minute lecture on hygiene and health from her...

I do hope tomorrow is a better day and that my work satisfies her because I really want 2 days off this weekend and I dont want to do any housework and I know she is not going to like it. Gosh I do hate her sometimes ....

15 Years to perform poorly !

Read recently that as per the adminstrative "reforms" in light of the whole Anna Hazare anti-corruption movement, the bureaucracy is finally being made accountable for its performance.

While the effort itself is laudable, but unlike the private sector where reviews are, at the minimum, annual and more often than not bi-annual, here the risk of losing your jobs arises only after 15 years of potential underperformance !!

Its truly unbelievable that the minimum number of years the government employees across IAS, IPS, IRS, Customs, excise et al have no accountability for the work that they do is 15 long years. While they would, I am sure (and hope), have annual reports and reviews of the work that they do, but unlike the private sector where it is pretty much 'move up' or 'move out' here it is 'move up' or 'move ON' to another year of mediocrity till finally 15 years later they might be held accountable...

Maybe the need for administrative reform would not have arisen in the first place had the accountability been measured regularly, goals set annually and most importantly political support provided timely and without any mal-intent...

Extra, extra, extra.....

The other day I had the chance to attend my son's class-moms lunch...now usually I am trying to escape these get togethers as most discussions revolve around the same children we have left behind at school or at home, or the nannies who take care of them - not exactly the intellectual stimulation I am looking for...

However, one does come away a lot wiser about what is the 'in' thing for your kids to do these days...the options are tremendous even for 4 year olds - cooking, football, western music, contemporary jazz, indian classical, mythology et al...

What happened to good old cycling, playing in the park, climbing trees and just plain and simple fun with no adult intervention or direct supervision...maybe its just me but there is a time and age for pushing your kids too far... call me old fashioned or maybe not competitive enough but sometimes it would be nice to just let kids be and figure out their interests and choices for themselves instead of thrusting too many activities upon them....

Outsourced - really?

I finally managed to catch an episode of the new series on Z-cafe called 'Outsourced'. Well, it is supposed to be seen from the eyes of an American called Todd, who is sent to India to head a BPO outfit...but somehow there are too many things wrong with it and it comes across as condescending, partially racist and totally culturally ignorant...here are my two-bits on whats not working for me..

• Why is the American shown as the manager - he could probably have been just another employee - this is NOT Air Force One and we dont need Harrison Ford to save us in the outsourcing business too....we can manage very well on our own, thank you very much
• The entire cast is American - well, they may have brown skin but they have obviously never lived in urban India and especially not visited it post 1991 - all the women wear bindis with their office trousers, have wavy 'Indian' hair and talk in a strange accent and all the men wear clothes clearly made in 1960
• The coffee table / dinner discussions between the gora man and the indian babe revolve only around 'arranged marriages' ....come on, get a grip, its a way of life and it works here...its too much of a cliche to put in the script
• At the after-work parties, all the sissy looking Indian men dance together in a corner while the women are missing in action....its upto the 2 goras to add some zing to the party - it would help if the script writers had actually visited India before writing the dialogues...

It was so exciting to watch the promo - India as a topic of an international sitcom, but alas the actual product sucks....catch it at 11 pm and let me know what you think of it

Being a mother

After 4 years of raising my son, it struck me today how much he means to me...while there was never any doubt in my mind that I love him to bits, I would sometimes (guiltily) reminisce about my 'before-kid' past life - the freedom to work long hours, to watch a late night film, to eat at new places without the fear of a new-taste puke on my new clothes, to wake up after 7 am (!)...

However today after seeing him go through a minor surgery and his post-operative misery, I have come to the conclusion that there is no greater joy and no greater pain than being a mother...to hear him scream out my name in his disoriented post-anasthesia phase, to see him whimper like an injured puppy made me want to cry out too...and it brought my protective motherly instinct to the fore like never before...and then to hear him settle down simply by being held in my arms and gently snore made me want to never let any further harm come to him ever again !

I was always the motherly sort - would coo at strangers' babies, but I was this motherly?? I had no idea...till today...

The price of an 'International Education'...keeping the 'MBA types' busy

Here's the thing, schools decided that since stay-at-home mothers must obviously be vegetating at home with all those house chores, they need an outlet for their creative thinking and analytical abilities....and to put all that past work experience and education to good use...

Enter...'School Projects'

For the past couple of days I have been heavily immersed in finding ways and means of teaching my child and his 20 other classmates about United States of America as part of a school project...while its great that parents are so heavily involved in schools these days, I sometimes wonder how schools would manage if all the mothers were working and really couldnt turn up at school or coffee mornings to discuss this, make chart paper cuttings and prepare craft activities for the kids...dont remember my mom ever being involved in such activities...

I also hear on the neighbourhood grapevine that if you are a working mother, the 'stay-at-home' school moms may not 'bond' with you fast enough or involve you in their catch ups...should I rethink my decision to get back to work at some point now that my kid goes to school ?